100 Things to Blame when your ISP breaks.

 

  1. Blame the telephone provider.
  2. Blame the local exchange capacity.
  3. Blame the rain.
  4. Blame the sunshine.
  5. Blame leaves on the server.
  6. Blame Canada.
  7. Blame a random technical fault.
  8. Blame a random technical fault outside of your control.
  9. Blame the user's settings.
  10. Blame the software they use.
  11. Blame the software you make them use.
  12. Blame a random corruption of software.
  13. Blame it on the moonlight.
  14. Blame it on a boogie.
  15. Blame it on a bogey.
  16. Blame it on your colleagues.
  17. Blame it on another ISP.
  18. Blame it on the network backbone.
  19. Blame it on an incompatibility of modems.
  20. Blame it on compatability of modems.
  21. Blame it on an initialisation string.
  22. Blame it on their initialisation string.
  23. Blame it on wet string.
  24. Blame it on damp string.
  25. Blame it cos its off-topic.
  26. Blame it cos its a flame.
  27. Blame it cos its a troll.
  28. Blame it on a cookie.
  29. Blame it being on a different cookie.
  30. Blame it on not knowing what a cookie is.
  31. Blame it on not deleting all the cookies.
  32. Blame it on the biscuit crumbs which fell into the server.
  33. Blame it on your name being taken in vain.
  34. Blame it on being a public forum.
  35. Blame it on being a moderated forum.
  36. Blame it on not knowing what a moderated forum is.
  37. Blame it on the charter.
  38. Blame it on unlimited web space.
  39. Blame it on limited unlimited web space.
  40. Blame it on an IP address.
  41. Blame it on a whole series of IP addresses.
  42. Blame it on the transparent proxy.
  43. Blame it cos the transparent proxy has been turned off.
  44. Blame it cos its poxy.
  45. Blame it for being off-duty.
  46. Blame it for being on-duty.
  47. Blame it on the engineers.
  48. Blame it on the hardware manufacturers.
  49. Blame it on the software manufacturers.
  50. Blame it on the software manufacturer's mother.
  51. Blame it on the post scanners.
  52. Blame it on a change in terms and conditions.
  53. Blame it on the 14 days notice required to change terms and conditions.
  54. Blame it on the Advertising Standards Association.
  55. Blame it on watchdog.
  56. Blame it on people whinging too much.
  57. Blame it on people not reporting problems.
  58. Blame it on the different number dialed.
  59. Blame it on the same number being dialed.
  60. Blame it on a number being withdrawn.
  61. Blame it as being a temporary measure.
  62. Blame it on 5 days investigating a problem with the newserver.
  63. Blame it on new software.
  64. Blame it on new software not tested.
  65. Blame it on investment in new technology.
  66. Blame it on old technology.
  67. Blame it on the article 39 problem.
  68. Blame it on the article 39 problem not existing.
  69. Blame it on the two hour disconnection.
  70. Blame it on preserving the network.
  71. Blame it on the random cut-offs.
  72. Blame it on non payment of amount due.
  73. Blame it on expired credit cards.
  74. Blame it on the autoresponder.
  75. Blame it on the 48 hour response.
  76. Blame it on the high volume of emails recieved.
  77. Blame it on a technical problem.
  78. Blame it on endeavouring to resolve the problem as soon as possible.
  79. Blame it on passing details on to the server team.
  80. Blame it on not having a timescale for resolution.
  81. Blame it on an undefined problem.
  82. Blame it on the undefined problem having rectified itself.
  83. Blame it on the file store devices.
  84. Blame it on posting to the wrong newsgroups.
  85. Blame it on requesting newsgroups.
  86. Blame it on requesting the wrong type of newsgroups.
  87. Blame it on a test post.
  88. Blame it on the approved header.
  89. Blame it on posts unfairly critising support.
  90. Blame it on a lack of support.
  91. Blame it on a dedicated member of the team being allocated.
  92. Blame it on the post falling off the server.
  93. Blame it on the apologies for not answering the post sooner.
  94. Blame it on the swearing.
  95. Blame it on remedial work.
  96. Blame it as an ongoing investigation.
  97. Blame it on the sparklies.
  98. Blame it on the rating in the internet magazines.
  99. Blame it on the missing posts.
  100. Blame it on the posting in html.


 

What ever you do, just don't blame it on oversubscription.

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